Monday, August 22, 2005

One Week before The End of the Summer Break!

M got only Two Weeks off from school/day treatment for the summer and the first was near the 4th of July and the second week is NEXT WEEK! As nice as it has been for me to have consistency and I will admit time off everyday even in the summer--I am looking forward to next Week!

I love Summer and have to admit this consistency has been nice but I do feel like there was No Summer! It is going to be interesting cramming in the Beach and fun along with new clothes shopping all in one week! Actually, I am thinking of waiting on the new clothes because all the sales will happen after school starts and there is very little pressure to conform at day treatment soooooo why not delay and get the great deals!

We had a nice weekend! I do have to say the Makala and Jeremiah are pretty great about taking LONG car rides! We left home at noon yesterday and drove out to see the property that is VERY tempting to go ahead and buy! Then we drove and checked out all the little towns along the way and on the river! Making it even more tempting to put in an offer on the 5 acre lot since all we can seem to find right on the river are either large houses on tiny lots or large lots with old houses or no houses....Seems to be rather rare to see this kind of land on the river with a 3,000 sq ft house that isn't even 7 years old! BUT--it would add some real time to Andrew's commute and is still a little more expensive then we want to spend just now! The real plan is to move in 2-3 years we have agreed to only jump the gun if we find something we think is PERFECT! Not sure this is it--but we do know we cannot find this kind of land on the River anywhere else???? hummmmm

Makala was able to talk a little with me about "What she is thinking" when she is in a RAGE! She told me that in her brain she says, "Don't do it--don't say No, don't have a fit" but that she feels herself doing it anyway!

I wish I could figure out some way to connect with that little girl who is telling herself "don't do it" when she is feeling herself do it anyway! We talked for awhile about ideas to see if we can 'work together' and get past these tantrums... Makala liked the idea of counting to five and trying to hold still and be quiet until she has finished counting....

We are going to try some Strong Sitting exercises. Some children have had great results from practicing Sitting up straight and deep breathing when they are NOT in trouble. Sort of like a Work Out and self control grounding experience.

I also FINALLY am getting someplace with the Neurological Testing Referrals I have been trying so hard to get! The case treatment manager said that when he read the Alcohol Related Neurodevelopmental Disorder booklet he Agrees completely that this may in fact be a huge factor! YEAH finally someone who actually thinks I might know my little girl.... He of course still feels RAD is a big part of everything.... and everyone knows how I am and always have been a little unsure of this Dx.

I guess, I just don't want to be in part of some big wave of Pop-Psychology! I remember in the 80's EVERYONE had Repressed memories and We had All been Sexually Abused but blocked it all out and Now needed to deal with it---OR---everyone was Multiple personality.... WELL---20 years later most of the real data on repressed memory has proven that if it actually does happen it is VERY RARE and most psychologists now feel multiple personalities are not really possible at least not the way Sybil made it seem anyway.... I would HATE to shrink this child for the next few years and find out 20 years from now that RAD was also over Dx and is NOT as huge of an issue as we all think....But then What if the science proves Reactive Attachment Disorder is Really Real and all the great answers are found?

I just keep going back and fourth on this issue! I feel like sometimes this RAD therapy is over focused...but, then most of it could NOT be damaging so no reason not to attempt the therapy and attachment work....so no harm done....right?

Frankly, I don't think there are two people on this earth that are exactly alike and I think MOST of us and our children are actually dealing with a variety of issues, personalities, prenatal exposure, post traumatic stress, and then all the things that any REGULAR Child might or might not have..... I just do NOT believe that ONE KEY is the answer to any of the issues any person deal with...It is a combination of factors and requires a combination of efforts and ideas.....

Anyway--Jeremiah has locked himself outside so I need to go....

Breaks my heart!

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