Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Boiling Point

We managed to make it through the holidays--barely this year. It has been difficult in our home with the stress level being sky-high all the time. Our little girl has grown and we cannot restrain her anymore when she is out of control.

Things are too violent.

There are holes in three walls of our beautiful home, it's strange but the wall kicking and banging didn't start until we moved into our new home...and now...we have holes in walls. Thank goodness we didn't buy the 100 year old Mansion with the Plaster walls... that house would have been shambles by now.

Makala has shaken the staircase banister so hard that it is loose and unstable now. She has taken to shaking it anytime she doesn't like what is said to her and anytime she is angry. Some things I can totally ignore when she is raging...like going to her room and turning on a "band" radio station and blasting the music... She does it just to get a rise from me so I just act as if I cannot hear it... I just wish it wasn't the Hip-Hop junk....

There was a knock-down drag out today. Utter and complete violence attacking me physically... It took everything inside of me not to Win that fight as I don't take well to being smacked around.

The Sheriff ended up at the front door... I got the bag of meds, letter from the doctor, and "current" folder of paperwork from all the services and recommendations and blah blah blah... The officer told me that they don't do anything when someone is "mentally ill."

So I asked, "Are we supposed to allow ourselves to be attacked and hurt? Can we defend ourselves? What are we supposed to do?" I finished my plea with a statement to the fact that it is looking like we need to TAPE all the info about all of our efforts, reports and begging for help on the window facing out so that when they find our dead bodies everyone knows we really did do our best....

The officer said --no Joke-- to slap her around and that we can backhand her too...just be sure not to leave any marks... He went on to actually tell me that we can "lock" her in her bedroom--"...as long as she has access to the toilet and they sell porta-potty's at WalMart...."

In other words, calling the police when your child is attacking you isn't going to accomplish much if the child has mental illness...Not at least in my state, or county. I asked the officer how we could access residential treatment as our daughter was so violent that we were really in fear that someone was going to be hurt....

He told me there is No Such thing in the state of Washington... so I made some calls around the county -- the county mental health crisis line told me this was true... So I asked what do we do? -- I was told it would take Months to complete the process and have the HIGHEST level of intervention... I asked does it matter that we were already there in Oregon...? Apparently not, and apparently it takes a bunch of steps to access crisis mental health services in our new state!

I called Oregon Adoption Services and told them we were evicting the tenants in our rental and moving back to Oregon as Makala was so out of control and violent that we were living in fear.... The residential treatment center recommended in August is only about 10 miles away and it looks like we are at the point we have no choice.

We don't have any other idea except ABUSE that will work to keep everyone in this house safe...

anyway--we will see if things get better tomorrow?

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