Friday, January 02, 2009

The Sixth Anniversary of the day our New Memories started

Once I publish this post I will need to go and edit the text under my Blogoversary Countdown... Now it will click to year seven. This is also the 6th anniversary of something my husband and I quietly honor... It is one of those days that parents share and remind each other about. It was just about exactly six-years ago right at the moment I am writing this post when I first laid my eyes on the soon-to-be one year old little boy that would be my son...



We had some snow that year during the holidays because I will never forget watching my husband figure out where to get the supplies and how to construct the Swing Set we were told had to be there before we would meet the little girl who had requested only three things of her growing-up family... In her four-year-old mind the only things that mattered were: A Big Sister, A Cat and a Swing set!

I can't even remember Christmas that year... I recall that we attended the OSU Alumni Christmas Party (which ends up being our last real date!) the night before we were to go before the Oregon Adoption Committee and be considered for the adoptive placement for two young siblings a 4 year old little girl and her 11 month old biological brother... By the end of the evening I think everyone in attendance was aware of our anxiety... I talk way too much when I can't write.

It was mid-December and going to committee is an interesting term considering the fact that we didn't Physically Go... Instead, we stayed by the phone like a 16 year old waiting for a call from a hopeful date! I think we finally broke down the month before and got on the cell-phone ball and chain. Either way, we were ready for the call... mostly expecting that on the First trip to committee we would likely Not be selected since the average is 2 and 1/2 times...

Sometime on the day that 7 uninvolved people met--with the caseworker of the children, their CASA ,and the Adoption caseworkers for the three Home Study approved
and interested adoptive parents we were chosen as the people who would be come the Best Advocates for the needs of Makala and Marty... and our Adoption Caseworker called to let us know...

The REST is a Blur to that moment exactly 6-years ago right this moment when I first saw Marty. That Christmas had to have happened, I remember Andrew building the swing... I remember rushing to the Store to find all of the THINGS we didn't have... And the little argument we had when Andrew so foolishly dared to suggest a High-Chair could wait until we got home... NOT!

One of my favorite ways to lovingly remind my husband that as Parents there are some things that cannot wait for the next budget cycle is to remind him, "Left up to your my dear husband we would be getting that High Chair just about Now!" I recall saying this just a few months ago... Thankfully, my husband has come to terms with the fact that waiting to get what you need for a child--means by the time you get it they might not need it anymore...

It was about at this moment 6 years ago when I looked at the beautiful little boy who was shockingly more beautiful then the one and only picture I had seen... was amazing! Feeling so blessed that He would not suffer too long without a growing up family... That he would need a special kind of transition... that he was so young he would have a very different experience then his older sister we would meet in the morning...

It was also at about this same time when I realized we had "Changed" our original plan without actually noticing it... We had planned on Sisters about the ages of 6 to 10 years old... We were surprised to even have the chance for children so young and in some ways didn't really expect to be considered the Best Advocates... Not with the fact that Andrew was turning 41 in a few days and I would be 40 exactly two-weeks later!

.... and OH MY GOD! (for real and in a very Prayerful WAY)... This little boy is very little and still poops in his pants! I had not changed a diaper in something like 15 years! And, after I changed Tori's Last diaper I made a RULE: I don't babysit anyone Younger then Tori...Later, I don't babysit for anyone in a Diaper... And HERE I WAS Looking at a little person who needed me to change his diaper and teach him how to use the toilet... not to mention walk, talk, and pretty much everything else!

... it was about this time when I realized that... it was going to be starting from almost the start... after I had just about finished with two... When I had done it all twice before and they were off to college nearly... And, I was about to turn 40 for goodness sakes! What the Heck was I thinking when I missed the fact that WE had changed our minds... For all of the right reasons?

And, then he smiled at me. What a smile! What a twinkle in his little eye he had... What an amazing Honor it was to be the mother he would know growing up... What a cutie pie he was...

And, then he fussed with the most sweet sounding cry I had ever heard... It was hard to know he would be my little boy and not be there his first Christmas... It was hard to know my Children were not with me on that Christmas morning... It was even more difficult to see his Foster Mother so in love with him and so not wanting to see him leave her arms. It was hard for me not to want to scoop him up and run out the door... Transitions are very draining and it's an emotional ordeal for Everyone...

When the visit at the restaurant 300 miles away from our home was over Andrew and I went to our hotel room... One of the last nights we would spend without being concerned about who was watching the little ones... One of the last nights we would have as just two people who loved each other. This night 6 years ago was one of the last we had as just the two of us... In the morning we would meet the little girl who would be five years old in just a few weeks...

We were so star-struck with her little brother we had no idea of what to expect... It was very difficult to stop thinking and talking about what was going on... Still, the gravity of the way our lives were about to change had not fully set in. We were still so excited about what was happening in the moment that it was still not a reality... It had only been a few weeks since we even learned we would be placed with children, and how old the children would be... We had the big sister, the cat and the swing set... And I made sure we had the high chair!

...Tomorrow will be the first day of the sixth year since we were introduced to all the members of the family we would become. Tomorrow will be the first day of the sixth year of our New Memories.

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